15 March 09

"Something wasn't natural about them, in addition to the fact that they weren't natural." -Col. David LeCours, Vermont Department of Fish and Wildlife chief warden.  He was talking about the antlers bolted onto the skull of a deer by Vermont dumbass Marcel Fournier, who will spend 10 days in jail for his abject stupidity.

28February 09

Ladies and Gentlemens!  The undisputed champions of suckitude*:
The Cleveland Browns!

*According to Google

22 February 09

The number of AC/DC songs with "Rock n Roll" in the title.  It goes up to 18 if you include all forms of the word "Rock".  "Ball" or "Balls" appears 4 times.

11 December 08

This Week:  Robert Byrd Speech Concerning Iraq, 2003 and a shorter cut of Byrd in action

25 November 08

I don't know if I can go on...
Mr. Bob Seger,  In the song, 'Turn the Page', are you seriously suggesting that some dude calling you a girl ruins your whole day, considering that you're a major star that gets laid any time he wants?
Get over it, man.

01November 08

The Pope Says Wealth Is Bad

No hyperlink...just don't be stupid.
11 October 08


Cursive is the Shark
Who only swims crookedly
and bangs into things.


This link will take you to my ancient ass website that preceded this'un
This page was originally published on 12 September 2008

Well, I intended to do a sidebar on several books I've plowed through (or not as the case may be), but being the procrastinator I am, I now have a stack of blankety blank books yelling, "Hey , why don't you want the five people who read your website to know about me?  I'm not good enough for them?"  So, I guess I'll try to knock them all out here on my Special Edition of...

Some of these books deserve much more coverage, while a few merit much, much less. Just buy the ones I like, don't buy the ones I don't, and you'll be fine.  Tally ho!

The War Nerd by Gary Brecher
 Here is the book to make you sound smart the next time the conversation turns to one of the countless squabbles going on around the world.  This guy does his homework, and he gives it to you in short bursts, and although he is somewhat prone to oversimplification, he is balls on most of the time.  Especially the part about how knee-jerk suckers who talk shit about France being a nation of sissies really don't really know a damn thing.  Read some history, tools.

The Road by Cormac McCarthy
 I once read the most boring book ever, Rendezvous With Rama, by Arthur C. Clark, a sci-fi book in which the most exciting event is an encounter with a maintenance robot.  This one comes in a close second.  Normally I digs ya, Cormac, but this book is almost as bad as On The Road by that stinky Kerouac guy, and that book made me vomit from boredom.

American Gunfight by Stephen Hunter
Did you know some South American cats with a serious grudge and very poor people skills nearly capped the guy who nuked Japan TWICE?  I knew, you dumbass, that's why you need to read more.  Hunter manages to stretch a 40-second gunfight into just over 300 pages, but it's all you ever wanted to know about the evolution of the Secret Service.  A great little bit of history that isn't glamorized or full of bullshit suppositions by whackjobs posing as historians.

The Wizard of Menlo Park by Randall E. Stross
If you like your idealized view of legends to get smacked around and brought down to Earth, here's your Thomas Edison story.  Stross makes Edison out to be oh so human.  Really, he comes off as an A.D.D. poster child, jumping from one invention to the next the moment he loses interest.  Poor money management skills, inattentions to his ladies, and foul attitudes toward people in general round out Stross' dry, dry biography.  I only made it half way through before I had to drink a gallon of water.  DNF.

Iron Coffins by Herbert A. Werner
An excellent account of the German U-Boat war by a guy who was not only there, he was a U-Boat commander.  Usually, guys this close tend to either suck as writers or beat the crap out of some agenda.  Werner does neitherAAs objective a story as you'll ever get from a stinking loser.

Neuromancer by William Gibson
 Epic geek love in the far future, where computers are still clunky and desktop style.  I reread this actually, having originally read it in 1986.  The hero is a bit rough, the ninja girl is super-sci-fi hot, and where else you gonna get Rastafarians in space?  Nowhere, that's where.  This probably shouldn't be your first sci-fi book (Starship Troopers would fit the bill nicely there), but it should be your next.

Flags of Our Fathers by James Bradley
  Bradley's dad was one of the guys in the famous flagraising photo on Mount Suribachi, Iwo Jima.  His book gives details about every guy in the picture, as well as how the picture came to be taken, and the battle that raged across the island long after the photo was snapped and plastered on every newspaper in America.  A solid read, but not fantastic.

IV by Chuck Klosterman
Presumably this is his fourth book, I don't know.  A pretty damned funny book by a guy who has interviewed everyone in music.  His story about pissing of Billy Joel is hilarious (because he apparently idolizes Joel, which is not so funny), and he confirms that Radiohead are as cool as you think they are.  Klosterman has a great flow, and he makes it seem effortless.  Word.

The Harlequin by Laurell K. Hamilton
I made it about forty-five pages into this fucking horrible book before I burned it and the clothes I was wearing while reading it.  Then I burned down the bookstore where it came from.  Hamilton is so obviously writing her own fantasy of banging the head werewolf, the head vampire, and basically every guy in the town where her Heroine lives.  Non-stop sexual references to the point of ridiculousness, even for a vampire/werewolf story.  Jesus, will someone please give this woman the high hard one?  One bunny is ironic, considering this 'book' reads like a Playboy short story that's 400 pages too long.  DNF.


The Fannie-Freddie Take Over in Plain English
When the Gov'mint took over Fannie May and her buddy Fred, this is what happened:
-Foreign investors were guaranteed to get every penny with interest for the bad debt they bought, which in turn guarantees more foreign investment in bad risk crap in the U.S. of A.
-The head honchos of both Fannie and Freddie, who engineered this foreclosure nightmare, were given $14 and $9 million dollars, respectively, to get on lifeboats and off the sinking ships they ran into icebergs on purpose.
-The common investors ( as in your 401k), as usual, saw all their stock become instantly worthless.
-Tha American Taxpayer (you) was handed the open-ended bill which will undoubtedly top a hundred billion dollars (most estimates double that), so that rich assholes who invested in a ponzi scheme designed to fuck the home buyer will not only not lose their investment, but will  profit from this disaster they created.  The System works!
-There was no reacharound.
-The following statement was issued:"There is nothing to see here.  Please go back to watching American Idol.  End transmission."

He picked a girl and he liked it